Hello everyone, I am Jay from Chennai. I thoroughly enjoy reading true gay experiences of people on this site. Today, I submit to readers one such personal experience which happened a few years back.
Summer of 2009
I was in my final semester of my engineering. I was a very good at academics and was one of the top rankers in my college. I had already landed a job through campus placement and I was enjoying a carefree life. I had also completed my final year project, so I used to attend college only one day week. So, I spent most of my day playing cricket with friends and watching movies. Since I had a lot of time, my aunt requested me to help her son, my cousin Sree, with preparing for his engineering entrance exam. Sree had just turned 18 yr and I remember this specifically because I had accompanied him for his driving license test. Sree was 4yrs younger to me and used to call me as “Anna” which is elder brother in Tamil. Due to my uncle’s frequent transfers, Sree had to change school many times which affected his studies. When Sree scored very low marks in his 10th exam, my uncle decided to settle in Chennai so Sree can concentrate on his 12th exam, which is very important to get admission good engineering colleges.
Since I was good in academics, I tutored Sree for his 12th board exam which completed recently. In those few months, Sree and I developed a good rapport as brothers. So at my aunt’s request, I continued to help Sree with preparing for his engineering entrance exams as well. Sree used to come to my house every evening for a couple of hours to study.
One such evening, my dad was stuck longer than usual at work. So I had to drop my mom at a nearby temple which was conducting a grand function. I asked Sree to solve an old question paper, while I dropped my mom at the temple. It was a short drive to the temple and I was back in 30mins.
When I entered the house, I noticed Sree had already packed his bag and was ready to leave. He seemed very nervous and squeamish. I asked him a couple of times what the problem was, but he didn’t give me a proper answer. I sensed that something was wrong, as he did not make direct eye contact. He had the look of guilt and he left in a real hurry.
I was alone in the house and like usual, i decided to watch some porn. I went to my room and I turned on my computer which was when I realized that my computer was still a little warm. When the computer screen came to life, it revealed that the computer was not shutdown properly. Based on Sree’s odd behavior, I guessed he watch porn on the internet. I was totally right when I checked my browser history. Sree watched Indian porn video clips and also read some Indian sex stories. I got curious and read one of the stories that Sree read. It was a hot incest sex story about a college guy his aunt. I was instantly horny. I read few more incest stories and then decided to watch some porn which I had downloaded the previous night. I opened media player on my computer to play the video which was when I noticed something in the “recently watched videos” history. Usually, I am very careful about deleting all history it should have been empty. That only meant that Sree not only read stories on the internet but also downloaded and watched some videos on my system. When I saw the video file names that were recently watched, I was shocked. I was angry and ashamed at the same time. Ashamed, not just because brother found porn videos on my computer, but he now knew about my dirty secret. Sree watched a video in which I recorded myself.
A tiny flashback …
A few months before
I was alone at home and was watching a Tamil movie from the 1990s. I had watched that movie before and was eagerly waiting for the erotic scene in which the husband ( the villain in the movie) asks his wife to do a strip show for him. At first, she refuses, but when the husband becomes angry, she reluctantly agrees. The villain commands her to remove each item of her clothing one by one which she reluctantly obeys. Since it was a mainstream movie, there was no nudity on screen. But it was a very erotic scene because of the master-slave relation. Watching that scene made me really horny. Since I was alone in the house, a weird thought came to my horny brain. For few years, I knew I was bisexual and used to dream about sex with both guys and girls. But that day, I had a completely different feeling. I had a strong urge to experience the feelings of a submissive partner and I decided to enact the scene. I opened my mother’s wardrobe and took out a blue sari, a matching petticoat, blouse, bra, and panty. I wore everything and stuffed my bra to make it look like real boobs. I looked myself in a full-size mirror. Below my Neck, I looked sexy and my naturally smooth hairless body added to the glamour.
Then another weird idea popped into my head. I decided to record myself. I turned on my webcam and began to act like the wife in the movie. Standing in front of the webcam I began to strip uttering the dialogues and imitating the feelings of a submissive partner. I removed the sari slowly from my left shoulder very reluctantly; unwrapped it around my waist 3 times and let the sari fall on the floor. I then unhooked my blouse and took it off revealing the white bra I was wearing. Then I untied my petticoat and let it fall to the floor. I turned my back to the camera and slowly unhook the bra and dropped it to the floor. I tucked my penis between my legs and pulled down my panty slowly revealing my naked backside. I covered my crotch area with one hand and crossed the other arm covering my nipples as my last attempt to save my dignity before turning to face the camera. I then walked around naked showing my ass to the camera. After a few minutes, I stopped the recording and saved the video with the name of the movie “Puriyadha puthir”. From that day, I enjoyed masturbating watching myself strip.
Back to the present story…
My younger cousin brother had watched the video in which I dressed like a woman and stripped fully. He knew my dirty secret. I wanted to beat him for having breached my privacy, but at the same time, I felt ashamed and really very scared. I cursed myself for being stupid enough to record and save my strip shows. I kept thinking what he might think about me, what he might say to others. I somehow managed to hide my feelings from my parents, but all these thoughts made me very sick in the stomach which kept me awake until 5 am. But eventually, I felt very exhausted and slept.
I wanted to avoid seeing Sree the next day. So I decided to cancel the exam preparation that evening. Sree did not have a mobile on his own, so I called his mom. My aunt picked up the phone and I informed her that I will be going out in the evening with my friends and asked her to tell Sree not to come in the evening. My aunt said ok, but she continued the conversation telling me that my uncle and she will be leaving for Kerala for a pilgrimage and won’t be back for a week. She said he was going to do some pooja, praying for Sree’s good results in the exam. She also said she was not taking Sree along so that he can prepare for the exams. She insisted that I make him study and practice hard for the exams while her family was away. Although I was madly angry at my cousin, I felt really sorry for my aunt. So, I told her not to worry and that I will do everything I can to help Sree. That evening I went out to the beach to relax and I was beginning to feel a bit better.
The next evening, Sree arrived at my place. I was very nervous initially. He smiled at me as though nothing ever happened and I smiled back. I felt better. Neither of us talked about the video and the exam preparation went somewhat normal for the next two days. On the third day, my mom was wearing the same blue sari that I wore in the video. Like I feared, Sree instantly recognized the sari when he came home that evening. Again the situation became uncomfortable and I felt embarrassed whenever my mom came into the study room serving us tea and snacks. Before leaving, Sree mentioned that his parents have left for Kerala for the whole week and that we can study at his house. I readily agreed as I wanted to avoid any more embarrassing situations.
The next evening I went to Sree’s house around 7 pm. I rang the doorbell and Sree opened immediately. He was wearing blue gym pants but wasn’t wearing any shirt. When I entered the living room, I noticed that the TV was on mute and playing the sexy fashion parade on FTv – women in bikini and men in underwear. I thought Sree might change the channel after all I was his older brother, but he didn’t. He left the TV running on mute. After talking general things for few minutes, we started to study. Watching Sree shirtless and the sexy FTv models were making me horny slowly. I also noticed Sree adjust his semi-hard cock a couple of times. I tried to control, but I couldn’t help staring at Sree’s chest and nipples which he casually kept rubbing. Sree caught me watching him 2-3 times. After a few mins, Sree said he wasn’t in the mood to study and closed his book. Even I was feeling strangely attracted to Sree, so even I wasn’t in the mood to teach him. So I asked what he wanted to do. He said he wanted to watch a movie that he downloaded yesterday. I enquired about the movie for which he replied that it was some thriller movie. I said ok, so he brought his laptop, played the movie and placed it on the table so both of us could watch.
It was not a full movie – the video started with the erotic scene from the same Tamil movie which I role played and recorded myself. I was shell shocked, really embarrassed and I remained frozen like a statue not knowing what to say or do – my mind still contemplating between yelling at him and begging him to stop. Sree walked behind me and placed his hands on my shoulder and slowly rubbed my neck. My body shivered when he touched. I was too scared and too ashamed to say anything – and almost forgot to breathe. But strangely, at the same time, I was feeling horny. Watching the erotic video was making me go crazy. I did not stop him. And that was the signal Sree was waiting for.
When the erotic scene finished, Sree took my hand. I did not protest. My sexual hormones worked overtime and I lost full control of my body to Sree, perhaps willingly, for I longed for being dominated and feeling submissive. Sree led me to his bedroom and I followed. He opened the wardrobe and took out his mother’s pink sari, blouse, petticoat, bra, and panty. I understood what he wanted so I asked him to wait outside. I closed the door and changed to the sari and stuffed the bra to make it look like real boobs. Sree’s bedroom had a full-size mirror attached to the cupboard. I made final adjustments to the sari and admired myself in the mirror for a couple of minutes. I then opened the door. While I changed my clothes, Sree put on his shirt. He was no longer exposing his chest. Sree came inside biting his nails nervously. But when he saw me his eyes lit up instantly. He devoured me with his eyes from head to toe. He took a step closer to me. I wanted Sree to dominate me and control me. So, I immediately crossed my arms over my breasts and played hard to get. In a timid voice, I told Sree to leave me. Sree understood that I was ready to play the submissive role. Sree came closer to me and told me not to make a fuss. He told me that if I obeyed him, he wouldn’t tell anyone about the video. I wasn’t sure whether that was part of the role play or a serious warning. Whichever it was, I was totally intimidated hearing that.
He went and sat on the couch and ordered me to come and stand in front of him. Sree became bolder and his voice was more commanding. I was fully willing to obey him. He asked me to remove the sari. I hesitated a bit. He voice became a little stern and repeated: “remove now”. When I lifted the pallu from my shoulder to remove my sari, Sree said, “Give me the pallu”. I went near him and gave him the loose end of my sari. He began to pull the sari with a firm grip. I turned slowly and my sari unfurled from my body. Sree then said, “Now take off your blouse”. With great hesitation, I started to unhook my blouse slowly. Sree encouraged me and said, “Yes, like that … remove the hook slowly … one by one”. After I removed the blouse, Sree asked me to give him the blouse. He sniffed the blouse and said “Nice smell, now your petticoat”. I untied the petticoat knot and let it fall to the ground. I picked the petticoat from the ground and gave it to him. He smiled and said, “You look hot. Turn around; I want to see your ass”. I turned around and Sree said, “mmm ahhhh nice shape”. I actually do have a nice bubble butt and the panties that I was wearing further accentuates the shape. After enjoying the sight of my butt, he asked me to turn and face him and then asked me to remove my bra. I removed the hooks one by one and opened the bra. Just before slipping it out completely, I crossed my arms over my chest to cover my nipples. I acted very shy. Sree said, “You are all mine today. Now be a good girl and slowly remove your panty”. While still covering my chest with one arm and somehow managed to slip my panty down to my knees and let it drop to my ankles. I covered my crotch area with my hands. He then picked up the panty, sniffed in deep and enjoyed the smell.
At this point, Sree was completely dressed and was sitting comfortably. And there I was standing stark naked in front of him with just my two hands barely covering my modesty. I kept my eyes down in shame. I felt extremely vulnerable in front of him. Until that day, I was the elder brother and he was the younger brother. I was his teacher and him my student. But today, the situation had reversed. He was my master and I was his obedient, girly, submissive puppet. I thoroughly enjoyed the feeling of shameful vulnerability and being dominated by my own cousin brother who was 4 years younger to me.
Sree asked me to stand in attention. I had to remove my hands and expose myself fully to Sree. All this while I tucked my cock between my legs. So my crotch looked like an unshaven pussy. He asked me to come closer to him. I was really very tensed not knowing what might happen next. He placed both his hands on my hips and I felt shock waves all over my body. He leaned forward and kissed my belly button and slowly licked his way downwards to my crotch. The sensation of his warm lips on my crotch was too much. I felt my knees go weak and I started to cum in loads between my legs. I never ejaculated so much before. And for the first time in my life, I felt like I experienced the real orgasm of a woman.
The feeling remained only for a few until I regained my senses. I felt immensely guilty and I ran to the washroom to clean myself. I changed to my normal clothes and left Sree’s home without speaking a word.
Although there was no fucking the first time, it was the beginning of our secret relationship. Every time I met Sree, I was torn between shame and erotic excitement. My sexual desires were beyond my control. In front of others, we behaved like brothers, and whenever it was just the two of us, we became lovers which continued for over 2 years until my cousin started dating a girl in college. At that time, we both decided that it would be best to stop.
Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed.
COMMENTS